IF. DISCONNECTED

I try to ask the question: Do people feel disconnected when surrounded by others?

Even when we live, work, or stay in the same space, loneliness still resides within us and is often overlooked.

Thus, I invited residents of the Netherlands to play various roles within families and friendships, whether real or imagined in real life, to explore the complexities of human relationships and the interplay between intimacy and isolation.

“I remember feeling quite isolated when I moved here 10 years ago. Over time, I’ve learned to transform that isolation into a sense of solitude—something I now value deeply.

In the beginning, it was challenging to make new friends, and not being invited to group events or lunches sometimes left me wondering why. It took courage to take that first step, and I’ve come to realize that life doesn’t just happen effortlessly foremost—it often begins with us. If it’s to be, it’s up to me.

Over the years, I’ve learned to invite the people who bring energy and joy into my life, rather than waiting for an invitation I might hope for. The efforts are reciprocated and now I can enjoy time with people around me after making deeper connections. I’ve also learned that embracing solitude can be just as fulfilling as building relationships.”

- Juliana

“We are a Latino family that arrived in Amstelveen in 2011-2015 the 6 of us, came back in 2018 with 5, and now we live 4 of us. My brother moves away in a couple of months. We try to keep family harmony, whilst we’ve grown and live separate lives.

My sisters live alone in the UK and Spain and face isolation. We face alienation as we continue to grow independently and feel the distance between us. It is nostalgic when we happen to be all together now.”

- Ana, lives in Amstelveen for years with her Latino family.

“Being an expat in the Netherlands, and having lived in several countries around Europe, such as Italy, Germany and the United Kingdom, I have experienced several times the feeling of isolation, as I struggled sometimes to integrate in the social environment after moving to a new country to study or work.

But it is possible to feel isolation in one’s own country of origin too. For example, in the last 14 years that I have lived away from Italy, I have also changed and sometimes I feel that I don’t completely fit with the people and society there anymore.

Overall, being an expat comes with some challenges, such as the feeling that you might never fully integrate in the new country, but it is a unique and very enriching experience that opens your mind and allows you to explore new cultures and new ways of life.”

- Alfredo, and his wife Rebecca studied and now both work in the Netherlands.

“Even with the most compassionate people by our side, there remains a sense of separation—a void that once held our loved one’s presence. We begin to understand that being surrounded is different from being understood.

The moments we feel most alone are often those when we realize that no one else can quite fill the place they held. In that way, isolation isn’t always about the absence of people; it’s the longing for someone irreplaceable that makes us feel truly alone.”

- Meera from India works and lives with her son in the Netherlands.

“Loneliness is not about the presence of absence of people around you.

It is about being brave enough to share your feelings.

To be connected is about feeling connected. When you dare to speak out your inner world with another person.

Feeling accepted who you are, even your hidden sides, breaks through the isolation.”

- Janna

“Isolation is a familiar lonely feeling living in the Netherlands. I come from a culture where community means everything, and it can be hard to bridge the cultural and generational divide.”

- Rebekah half Irish and half Native American, from the Abenaki

“Loneliness has become the new epidemic, while its suffering is a shame. To settle our insecurity, we read the same books, watch the same movies, and are shaped by the same pop culture.

We are materially eager to show our differences and spiritually fear being out of the mainstream. As a result, we come from one similarity to another, from one stereotype to another. Are you still scared of being isolated? ”

- Muijs, who is from China, now studies at VU.

“I’m Irene, studying in Amsterdam. In my school life, I often share the common space with a diverse group of people. Some may be physically close, yet we remain strangers. Others may be near, but we never truly share our deepest feelings with each other.

The external environment of architectural spaces, the physical proximity between people, and the true intimacy of interpersonal relationships—these are the themes that I was thinking about while taking these photographs. Through this series, I try to explore how physical distance and human connection affect each other, and I seek to convey the emotions that I wish to express to someone in my heart.”

- Irene, who is from China, studied at VU for half a year.

“For me, loneliness is both a struggle and a freedom. As a newcomer studying in Amsterdam, I have yet to build strong connections with those around me. My lack of complete trust in this environment makes me hesitant to fully express myself. The inability to release my emotions leaves me feeling misunderstood, and loneliness quietly takes hold.

But loneliness also grants me freedom. I have learned to focus on myself, no longer relying on social interactions to fill the void. In solitude, I have found a sense of stability. True freedom is not about escaping loneliness, but learning to coexist with it.”

- Jing, from China, studies at VU.

“Loneliness is the yearning for something more, but not knowing exactly what that something is. ”

- Rachel